{Breath}ing deeply

On days like today,
when I feel especially broke,
i have to remind myself to take a step back.
To breathe.

I remind myself on these kind of days that money doesn't equal happiness. Mac and cheese for dinner or not, I have a husband who loves me . Unconditionally and always. For better or worse. And while we may not be in the forbes top 20, these are the days we will look back on and cherish someday. The days of our youth, when we were young and free. No children, no ties. Open to possibilities. Open to adventure.

If I were in a different time and place with boatloads of money, there is no guarantee I would be happy. I may, in my alternate world, have a closet stuffed to the brim with Jimmy Choo and Chanel purses and be amazingly stylish but I may be in love with an idiot. Or not in love at all.

So today, I am making a concious choice to be thankful for what I do have. Even as frustrated as I am with the now. While my 30D isn't the 5D, I do have a camera that I was so longing for a year ago. I may not have my branding, or my custom blog that i want so desperately that I've actually dreamt about it, but I do have a website. All the greats took it one day at a time too. And while I may not have all the answers, at least I'm beginning to understand.

I'm frustrated with album designing, but I'm learning. I'm frustrated with my work flow process but it will come with practice. I'm frustrated with learning how to use the TRA mix, but I do have them. And when I figure out my own unique look it will be a glorious, glorious day. {And there will be free ice cream for all.}

It's all about the learning process in this thing called life. One foot in front of the other. {Breathe} Getting up and trying again. {Breathe} The joy of discovery. And all the glorious possibilities tomorrow may hold...


Brooke said...

I understand you to a tee!!!! I want so badly to have my image set and the nikon d3!!!! but yes you will get there! me too I hope :) your stuff is looking great so dont be so hard on yourself!

Amie Steele said...

So beautifully said....I can so relate:)

Anna Hedges said...

Amen, sister !!! :)

Can I ask a totally dumb question? How do you get your images to be so large on here when you post them?


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I am married to an amazing man named Ryan. He is the love of my life and my best friend. As of January 2008 I officially started my own photography business, Beloise Photography. I picked the name because it is something that doesn't exist.... something that i wanted to sum up into a word but couldn't. It is the smell of fresh cut grass and hide and seek in the dark. It is a new pair of fabulous shoes. It is fall and all its glory... starry summer nights. Apple cider and fresh picked flowers. Beloise is all that you taste, touch, see and love dearly. The smells that trigger childhood memory's. All your favorite things in one word. A song that speaks to your soul. Sublime happiness. A field of daisy's. Firefly's. Mistletoe. City lights. The smell of homemade cookies. The first snow.... Beloise is about cherishing life. Savoring the moments. Breathing deeply.... and just living...